Fruit.  Nest.  Seems I’m up a tree today, and I can’t see the forest for the trees or something like that.

I am not, by nature, an optimist.  I leave that to my dh.  I am, I must admit, a pessimistic optimist.  Seriously.  Well…the proper descriptive would be pragmatist, but I like the quirkiness of labeling myself a “pessimistic optimist”.  It has a higher “Huh??” value.

Justifying my pessimistic optimism with my steadfast faith in Jesus Christ can be a bit dicey.  In the Spirit, I know and understand, “But seek first His Kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”  Matt 6:33 In the flesh, however, I want to strive to get ahead, to save up for that rainy day, to create that elusive nest egg and coax it into a bigger shell.

A discussion dh and I have had many times over the past couple of decades is how we never seem to be able to get ahead financially.  Just when we feel the bonds loosening, something or several somethings break down, fall apart, rear their ugly heads, etc..  And then, we are back to square one or minus one.  DH told me the other day when I was whining about recent ugly heads that one of the main reasons I created OSS was so that we could cover the costs of aforementioned ugly heads.  I then posed the rhetorical question, “So, if I didn’t have OSS, would the ugly heads OSS pays for go away?”  It seems a logical question since we never have any extra to feather the nest.  It’s almost always neck and neck.  The costly issues expand to fill the wallet space.  Well…that’s how it seems to me, the pragmatist…I mean, the pessimistic optimist.

One of the fabulous things I love about God is that he enjoys a good discussion.  I believe he finds me an amusing challenge.  I do not hesitate to narrow my eyes at him and ask him pointed questions like, “Why can’t we ever get ahead?”  and “Why, when we want to sell a house, is the market always horrible?” or “Why is our egg so minuscule that we need a high-powered microscope to see it?”   A couple of days ago, I was putting those questions to God.  He answered, as he frequently does, with a picture.  I saw it as plain as day…the Israelites scouring the ground for their “daily bread”, the manna.  Wow.  God provided.  He provided just enough and no more.  It’s about reliance…on Him.  The hungry (and whining) Israelites were told to gather only enough to see each family through the day.  They were not to store up more for the next day or the next week.  They were to rely on the Lord for daily provision.

How do we appreciate what we have, right here and right now, when we are always looking into the future at what we might need?  Ahhhh….  Contentment.  That’s an elusive commodity in today’s world.   Manna.  Daily bread.  Earthy treasures are consumed by moths, rust, dust.  Seek eternal treasures.   Perhaps if I repeat the words often enough and with enough enthusiasm, they will sink in.  But how does one forget about the water main leak that flooded the basement and required a backhoe and plumbers to dig up the front lawn to the tune of many hundreds of dollars?  How do I put from my mind the fact that a beloved fur baby is struggling to live?  Do I ignore the two…not one, but two…bills for college tuition and books?  How do I focus on the here and now?  How do I become and remain content?  So many questions.  Only one answer.  Nike says it best.  Just DO it.